A New View

The weekend with the Carmelites was restful, but at the same time, intensive (as discernment often is). I went into the weekend hoping to "learn" and "more deeply understand" my vocation. I was disappointed in these expectations. Which is to say, I got out of the weekend exactly what I needed to!

Huh?

My focus right now needs to be on the here and now. Is God calling me to Carmel? He very well might be. But right now I can't enter. It's not time, I have stuff to do, and I also have to build relationship with the Carmel I hope to enter. So many things are accomplished at once: I work, pay off debt, serve the Kingdom, build relationships with the Sisters, allow them to know me and me to know them, and of course I continue writing and above all, deepening my prayer and spiritual life.

At first, I felt like I came away from the weekend with more question marks, but then I realized that I'd been driving 110 mph with my hand white-knuckling the steering wheel while I demanded through clenched teeth, "Jesus, show me where I'm going!"

Jesus: "Um. It doesn't work that way..." 

Me:  "Whaddyamean it doesn't work this way. Look, I'm driving, you tell me where to go. It's that simple!  Right?  We're doing this, right?"

(hits speed bump going 110 mph) 

Me: "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?" 

Jesus: "Move over."

In other news... I've adopted a new domain for this blog. Soon, very soon, "Fredinthecan" will be no more. You can find this blog at http://viewuphere.com  Please share with friends and family!