Discernment is not a Shell Game

I promised in my last post that my next post (that is, this post) wouldn't be three months away. See?

In certain circles, the term "discernment," as in "I'm trying to discern God's will for me," or "I'm in discernment," is used frequently. I have no problem with that. If you are struggling to find the "whys" of your life, you're discerning. It doesn't mean you have to be thinking about becoming a priest or a monk or a nun. You may already be living your vocation, but you could be unsure as to the why or the how of living that vocation fully and with joy. You might have the feeling inside that there is still something more, something elusive calling you... where? If this is the case, what you're feeling is the pull and tug of a God who loves you and wants you to live more deeply in God's life and peace.

So you enter into discernment, and that's a good thing! But I've noticed with people that sometimes moving through this process - and it IS a process with many levels, layers and aspects - can feel like a shell game. Then it becomes, you know, more like "I have to figure all this out, or I will lose the prize. Oh noes!"

I've experienced this myself, and what I've learned is whenever it starts to feel stressful, like I have to pick a course of action, or guess which is the "right" way to go, I'm not actually discerning. I'm relying on my own logic, feelings, and more often than not, my fears, known and hidden. That's not how God works, as it turns out.

I think a large part of the problem is that we are so used to "doing" and "making" things happen. We make graphs and charts, we examine our navels, we conduct trials and collect information, we set up a checklist, then hit GO and expect to watch everything fall into place. Sometimes, with certain kinds of things, this is exactly what we need to do. But when it comes to discerning what we are called to, this approach generates more frustration and even agony than it does success.

Before I muck it up with more words words words, I'm going to leave you with two videos I've recently found that spoke to me clearly. They are both delivered by the awesome Fr. Mike Schmitz. The first one is on Discernment, the other one is about Vocation. They are short and totally worth your time. God bless!